Apple's Siri Learns New Jokes

Apple appears to have recently updated Siri on iPhone, iPad, Mac, and HomePod with a slew of new jokes to tell. Based on reports on Twitter and from MacRumors readers, the new jokes started rolling out earlier this month.

When you ask Siri a question like "tell me a joke" on an iOS device, Mac, or the HomePod, Siri has dozens of fresh responses to share with you.

newsirijokes1

  • "What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef."
  • "One night, I paid $20 to see Prince. But I partied like it was $19.99."
  • "I taught a wolf to meditate. Now he's Aware Wolf."
  • "What do you call a labrador that becomes a magician? A labracadabrador."
  • "What do you call a talking dinosaur? Thesaurus."
  • "What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies."

With the humorous new additions, Siri's joke repertoire has expanded significantly, and you need to ask for jokes several times before hearing a repeat. Siri also appears to have new knock knock jokes, accessible by asking Siri "knock knock."

Apple updates Siri on a regular basis with new content in an effort to instill the personal assistant with personality and expanded capabilities. In February of 2017, for example, Siri promoted the LEGO Batman Movie with a series of funny responses to the query "Hey Computer," and when Pokémon Go was released, Siri was updated with several Pokémon-related responses.

newsirijokes2
Siri is often criticized for shortcomings in comparison to AI-based offerings from competing companies like Microsoft, Amazon, and Google, which is said to be due to Apple's heavy focus on protecting user privacy.

Apple is aiming to make major improvements to Siri, however, and has recently hired former Google AI chief John Giannandrea and the team from Init.ai, a customer service startup focused on creating AI with natural language processing.

Popular Stories

iOS 26

15 New Things Your iPhone Can Do in iOS 26.2

Friday December 5, 2025 9:40 am PST by
Apple is about to release iOS 26.2, the second major point update for iPhones since iOS 26 was rolled out in September, and there are at least 15 notable changes and improvements worth checking out. We've rounded them up below. Apple is expected to roll out iOS 26.2 to compatible devices sometime between December 8 and December 16. When the update drops, you can check Apple's servers for the ...
Intel Inside iPhone Feature

Apple's Return to Intel Rumored to Extend to iPhone

Friday December 5, 2025 10:08 am PST by
Intel is expected to begin supplying some Mac and iPad chips in a few years, and the latest rumor claims the partnership might extend to the iPhone. In a research note with investment firm GF Securities this week, obtained by MacRumors, analyst Jeff Pu said he and his colleagues "now expect" Intel to reach a supply deal with Apple for at least some non-pro iPhone chips starting in 2028....
iPhone 14 Pro Dynamic Island

iPhone 18 Pro Leak Adds New Evidence for Under-Display Face ID

Monday December 8, 2025 4:54 am PST by
Apple is actively testing under-screen Face ID for next year's iPhone 18 Pro models using a special "spliced micro-transparent glass" window built into the display, claims a Chinese leaker. According to "Smart Pikachu," a Weibo account that has previously shared accurate supply-chain details on Chinese Android hardware, Apple is testing the special glass as a way to let the TrueDepth...
iPhone 17 Pro Cosmic Orange

10 Reasons to Wait for Next Year's iPhone 18 Pro

Monday December 1, 2025 2:40 am PST by
Apple's iPhone development roadmap runs several years into the future and the company is continually working with suppliers on several successive iPhone models at the same time, which is why we often get rumored features months ahead of launch. The iPhone 18 series is no different, and we already have a good idea of what to expect for the iPhone 18 Pro and iPhone 18 Pro Max. One thing worth...
iOS 26

Apple Seeds Second iOS 26.2 Release Candidate to Developers and Public Beta Testers

Monday December 8, 2025 10:18 am PST by
Apple today seeded the second release candidate version of iOS 26.2 to developers and public beta testers, with the software coming one week after Apple seeded the first RC. The release candidate represents the final version iOS 26.2 that will be provided to the public if no further bugs are found. Registered developers and public beta testers can download the betas from the Settings app on...
Johny Srouji

Apple Chip Chief Johny Srouji Could Be Next to Go as Exodus Continues

Sunday December 7, 2025 10:41 am PST by
Apple's senior vice president of hardware technologies Johny Srouji could be the next leading executive to leave the company amid an alarming exodus of leading employees, Bloomberg's Mark Gurman reports. Srouji apparently recently told CEO Tim Cook that he is "seriously considering leaving" in the near future. He intends to join another company if he departs. Srouji leads Apple's chip design ...
Johny Srouji

Apple's Chipmaking Chief Johny Srouji Responds to Report About Him Potentially Leaving

Monday December 8, 2025 9:23 am PST by
Apple's chipmaking chief Johny Srouji has reportedly indicated that he plans to continue working for the company for the foreseeable future. "I love my team, and I love my job at Apple, and I don't plan on leaving anytime soon," said Srouji, in a memo obtained by Bloomberg's Mark Gurman. Here is Srouji's full memo, as shared by Bloomberg:I know you've been reading all kind of rumors and...
top stories 2025 12 04a

Top Stories: iOS 26.2 Coming Soon, Apple Execs Depart, and More

Saturday December 6, 2025 6:00 am PST by
You'd expect things to be starting to wind down for the holidays by now, but that doesn't seem to be the case yet in the world of Apple news, with Apple just about ready to release iOS 26.2 and other operating system updates to the public. There was also a flurry of news this week about Apple executive departures, some expected and some not so expected, while we also learned that Apple and...
ive and altman

Jony Ive's OpenAI Device Barred From Using 'io' Name

Friday December 5, 2025 6:22 am PST by
A U.S. appeals court has upheld a temporary restraining order that prevents OpenAI and Jony Ive's new hardware venture from using the name "io" for products similar to those planned by AI audio startup iyO, Bloomberg Law reports. iyO sued OpenAI earlier this year after the latter announced its partnership with Ive's new firm, arguing that OpenAI's planned "io" branding was too close to its...

Top Rated Comments

scrapesleon Avatar
100 months ago
There’s a lot of things to fix about Siri making her learn new jokes should be last on the agenda
Score: 66 Votes (Like | Disagree)
jakeowens Avatar
100 months ago
People who use siri: "Siri is a joke"
Apple: "oh ok, here's some more jokes."
People who use siri: " No we said SIRI IS A JOKE... not ADD MORE JOKES.
Score: 55 Votes (Like | Disagree)
Virinprew Avatar
100 months ago
That’s very useful. Thanks Apple. /s
Score: 44 Votes (Like | Disagree)
TheBensonBoy Avatar
100 months ago
Apple is literally one giant Siri

Us: "Hey Apple, fix Siri"
Apple: "Ok, here is what I found for 'Fix Siri'"
Apple: ...
Apple: "There we added some jokes, useless ****, and while we are at it, we added a BUNCH of annoying responses such as 'I found this on the web'!"
Us: "No no no... This is not what I meant. Actually fix Siri"
Apple: ...
Apple: "... How about a joke?"

I LITERALLY created an account just for my frustration over the subject

Although the jokes are actually funny, she is still useless. Telling me a freaking joke will not add stuff to my calendar, turn on my alarm, and any other basic thing she should do, any better
Score: 32 Votes (Like | Disagree)
kahkityoong Avatar
100 months ago
Siri IS the joke.
Score: 21 Votes (Like | Disagree)
nt5672 Avatar
100 months ago
I am just surprised that they did not hold this new functionality for a Keynote speech from Cook. "Its incredible!"
Score: 10 Votes (Like | Disagree)